Your essay was great! It really stood out to me because it was very different (but in a good way). I wouldn't think to write about something like that but it was really good!
I really like your voice throughout the essay - I could hear the goat-like laugh and your closing remarks made me chuckle. Very sassy :)
How you made it sound like a real radio broadcast, "So this is Zoie Vanderbush signing off, stay sassy America." I loved that! :)